After months of insane rhetoric from each side of the aisle, it’s lastly election day. With scores of Individuals heading to the polls that haven’t already solid their ballots, all that’s left to say now’s “nicely, it’s been run America. So lengthy, and thanks for all of the fish.”
In case you’re of a sure mindset, at present’s midterm elections really feel like the tip of an period as one facet believes it’s saving the nation from “Communists that need to make your children trans” whereas the opposite facet thinks this shall be “the final American election ever” if the opposite facet good points management of Washington. Apparently it’s all or nothing. Do or die. Don’t go Go and don’t gather $200.
And whilst you can level to an entire checklist of the explanation why this all feels so pointless, I personally blame the January 6 rebellion because the tipping level. So to have fun the obvious finish of democracy, right here’s a playlist that has completely no central theme to all of it and has nothing to do with any disgraced fascist metallic musicians.
Iced Earth – “1776” or “Star Spangled Banner”
What might be stated about our nationwide anthem that hasn’t already? Written by Francis Scott Key, it’s an enormous center finger to the Brits, successfully saying “suck it, you limey nerds. Your rockets’ pink glare and bombs bursting in air did fuck all to our flag.” Additional factors for stealing a British consuming music’s tune. I’m certain Jon Schaffer had this in his coronary heart whereas he was threatening police with bear spray.
Iced Earth – “Burning Instances”
Although this music’s initially primarily based on the Spanish Inquisition and the best way it utterly perverted the very faith it claimed to like and defend. It’s kinda like Jon Schaffer and all the opposite MAGA chuds on January 6 that claimed to like regulation enforcement and the Structure, however beat up on each in the identical day.
Iced Earth – “When the Eagle Cries”
Once I consider songs that evoke the type of sorrow I’d anticipate an actual patriot to shed a tear to, “When the Eagle Cries” isn’t one in all them. That is, nevertheless, the right “aw man, our countree is goin’ down da shitter” tune for the Large Mac guzzling LARPers like Jon Schaffer that perpetrated the largest assault on democracy within the nation’s historical past.
Iced Earth – “Nice Heathen Military”
I’ll be sincere right here. There’s a bit and I’ve been attempting to comply with the bit, however there’s solely a lot Iced Earth I can abdomen, particularly understanding now how a lot of a traitorous piece of shit Jon Schaffer is. So let’s simply say this music represents the scores of pasty white failures that couldn’t even get a room of outdated individuals to cease voting. Solution to suck, nerds.
Iced Earth – “Disciples of the Lie”
Had El Trumpito not spent weeks and months pumping up a conspiracy principle that the election was rigged, 9 individuals (together with 5 regulation enforcement officers) would nonetheless be alive. All for a silly fucking lie that we’re nonetheless coping with now. Do you know that over 300 candidates in at present’s election imagine the 2020 election was stolen? Within the phrases of Metallica, “we’re so fucked.”
Iced Earth – “Ghost of Freedom”
This one’s a fairly apparent selection. With each side believing they’re voting to save lots of freedom within the nation, might or not it’s that it’s truly terminally ailing, on life assist, and about to have the plug pulled anyway? Who is aware of? What I do know was when Jon Schaffer was charged with obstruction of an official continuing of Congress, and trespassing on restricted grounds of the Capitol whereas armed with a lethal or harmful weapon, he in all probability actually noticed the ghost of his freedom drift away.
Iced Earth – “My Personal Savior”
Like most songs by this band, “My Personal Savior” in all probability has to do with some everlasting battle or no matter, however I’m certain all of the people who acquired arrested, charged, and agreed to plea offers would name themselves “My Personal Savior.” Particularly Jon Schaffer, whose involvement within the democracy damaging rebellion led to him coming into a plea settlement the place he should rat on his fellow Oathkeepers if he ever desires to keep away from the within of a jail cell.
Iced Earth – “Brainwashed”
This one’s straightforward. In case you have been satisfied to actually storm the middle of the American federal authorities and thought you weren’t ever going to be caught, you have been brainwashed. I imply, come on — DC is among the most closely surveilled locations on the planet. How dumb do it’s important to be, Jon?
Iced Earth – “Days of Rage”
With all of the speak about society collapsing and seething anger and whatnot, this music completely encapsulates the occasions of January 6 and the continued rage that boils over throughout all the political spectrum within the nation. Seems like we’ve had years of rage and who is aware of if there’s ever going to be a return from that.
Iced Earth – “Excessive Water Mark”
The ultimate music of a 3 half sequence primarily based on the Battle of Gettysburg. You already know, that main Civil Battle battle? Some say we may be headed to a different a kind of, so perhaps listening to this could possibly be thought-about preparation? Both manner, right here’s hoping that January 6 was the excessive water mark for this nation’s madness. I can also’t assist however think about this music was on Jon Schaffer’s thoughts as he briefly ran from the feds earlier this 12 months. Particularly the half on the finish the place Tim “Ripper” Owens wailed “It’s all my fault/The blood is on my palms.”
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